Monday, June 28, 2010


No baby.

We set up the cradle, talked with the caseworker a few times, bought pink onesies, and just generally got excited. At the last minute they called to say that the baby's grandma had pushed through her background check and would be taking the baby straight from the hospital. Sounds like good news for the family. Was very deflating for us.

Poor, tenderhearted Jesse suffered the most. He came in to show me a toy that he wanted to share with the baby. I broke the news that no baby was coming. He dropped his head and groaned, "Awwww." Then his sadness grew so great it turned to anger and he said, "I'm going to call them and say mean words." He threw the toy across the room and burst into tears. For the next hour or so, he slunk around with a sad face. Finally, he told me that the baby would come to our house after she was done at her grandma's house, and I let that fantasy stand uncontested. Then later in the afternoon he agreed to a therapeutic trip to see a newborn friend in our neighborhood.

This is the kind of roller coaster we signed up for. Roscoe took the cradle back apart, and it's in a sad heap in the corner of my bedroom. It's fine. We're just, you know, babyless.


  1. Awwwww. Sweet Jesse. I think I would probably have reacted closer to him than to you. ...That's why I dont think I could ever do what your family does. You, Ang, are just so amazingly open hearted. You loved that baby from the second you knew she existed. But then you can love her enough to be happy she's with her Grandma. Your love is amazing to me.

  2. I'm so sorry to hear that. But happy the baby is with her family. Another baby will need you more and you'll all be ready!

  3. I frowned at the universe in your behalf over this.